The Christian Parents’ Call to Stand Out
“To say that Christian parents are called to raise their children differently than the world is not a brand-new revelation…”
We remember the meme very well. It was seemingly just one of those that pop up on your social media feed that you’re not sure exactly how or why it got there. Algorithms, go figure! This one was different, though. The timing was different. The content was an affirmation of what the Lord had been stirring within our family for a long time. (If God can use a donkey to speak for Him, He can certainly use a meme couldn’t He?)
There was more at work that day than a simple social media algorithm. God was driving home an awareness that He was growing within us to raise our children differently than the world and was reminding us that our window of greatest influence to do so is limited. To say that a Christian parent is called to raise their children differently than the world is not a brand-new revelation. God’s Word has given such a mandate for thousands of years.
“And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength. And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.” Deut. 6:5-9
Practically living out that mandate, however, often proves to be the challenge. You know the usual suspects: ball games, practices, homework, the demands of our own jobs…the list goes on and on. None of these pursuits are bad in and of themselves. Where we cross into the danger zone is when we as parents allow the schedules and “stuff” of the world to cause us to put the spiritual development of our children on the back burner.
Raising Little Disciples
So, what are Christian parents to do? Throw our hands up in surrender as if we have no other choice with our priorities? Continue to play the comparison game with other families? Can we be real with you? (We’re going to assume you said yes. Otherwise, this would be a very short blog.) –> As God’s disciples, the life He calls us to pursue is not about what is easy, socially acceptable or even spiritually comfortable. If that is true for us as individuals, it is certainly true for us as parents who are charged with the discipleship of our children.
John Bolin recently published a book titled “How Do You Spell Worship with Your Family” where he calls this crossroads of spiritual parenting a “pandemic of purpose”. It seems that sums up our predicament perfectly in today’s culture. Too many Christian parents are losing sight of their purpose as the primary disciple-makers in their home. Now, we don’t suggest you pull your kids out of being involved in all their activities and personal pursuits (we see those hands going up around the room).
However, as Paul challenges us in Romans 12:2, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is- His good, pleasing and perfect will.”
Questions to Consider:
A good starting point to answering these questions would be to consider what values you are prioritizing and modeling for them in the home.
- How are you raising your kids differently than the world?
- How are you raising your kids to pursue Christ and live on mission for Him?
Pursuing Jesus as a Family
Since this is a blog post and not a book, let’s get to some application and give you two great places to start in raising your children to pursue Christ: commit to prayer and commit to serving together. We have always prayed for our children, but recently we have begun to pray very specifically for them. One of those prayers is that they will SEE the needs of those around them. In a world filled with a focus on “me”, we want them to SEE beyond themselves and then meet those needs.
We want to make serving the Lord a part of the DNA of our family, so we pray intentionally for opportunities and then strive to teach our children why we serve: we want to be the hands and feet of Jesus and point people to Him.
“… so we pray intentionally for opportunities and then strive to teach our children why we serve: we want to be the hands and feet of Jesus and point people to Him.”
In Matthew 25:40, Jesus speaks to the importance of serving others in His name: “The King will reply, Truly I tell you, whatever you did for the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” Pray with a purpose for your children and pray for opportunities to serve together.
Then, as you pray, act on your prayers. Experience is often our greatest teacher. We realized that we take several family trips a year whether on vacation, going with Dad to his annual conference, or on other outings. To put feet to our conviction, we have started looking for intentional opportunities to serve and show Jesus’ love to others as part of those trips. Demonstrating to our children that they can serve others even while on vacation is a powerful lesson.
Whether at home or on the road, set a goal to engage in some sort of mission project together as family. Our family loves to serve together at our local food pantry and crisis pregnancy center. Also, promote serving within the home. An effective strategy we’ve used is rewarding our kids when we witness them serving each other. Each time we see them serving someone else, we put a bead in a jar. When they get a certain number of beads, they get a reward. There’s nothing wrong with a little incentive to reinforce the behavior!
“The more you prioritize serving others as a family, the more that value will stick with your kids over the course of their lives.”
If you can’t readily find a ministry or other established service opportunity in your community, create one! One ministry we have created with our children is a postcard ministry. We paint watercolor postcards and mail them to people in our church who we know need some extra love at that time. Find a need that your family can meet and make it a priority to teach your children to serve others as Christ served.
The old adage is so true that lasting lessons are often caught not taught, but sometimes you need to teach to reach. The more you prioritize serving others as a family, the more that value will stick with your kids over the course of their lives. That, my friends, is living differently than the world!
Written by: Capri and Jason Brooks